Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
