My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize