i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
