these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize
