i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize