It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
