Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
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