Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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