He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Randomize
