i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
