Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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