How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
