this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
