What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
