I want to walk on stilts...naked
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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