Tell her she can't have a vagina
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
