**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
