You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
my shit smells like andre
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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