I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize