I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
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