I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
