Porn is love you can see.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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