Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
We had to coat check the pizza.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Randomize
