I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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