No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
