boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
