yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
