Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
