I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
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If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
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College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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