Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Randomize
