oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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