STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Sacagawea was the original milf.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
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