We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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