i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
