Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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