he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
