everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
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He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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