i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize