He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
