so that wasnt chicken after all
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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