That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
