Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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