That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.