So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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