He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
