Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
So apparently I’m into choking now
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