I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
