I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
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It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
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After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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