I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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