We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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